


A Little Less Sixteen Candles

by dollphase



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Marauders, Marauders Friendship (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-12 18:02:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29888412
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dollphase/pseuds/dollphase
Summary: Being sixteen...In which ears are pierced, romance blossoms, and Snape gets punched...twice.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter, Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!!!! This fic is goning to be pretty chill and I am not going to have an update schedule for it. Also, this chapter is short and from an outsider's POV but the following chapters are all going to be in the marauder's POVs, so don't worry! Also this is realllllyyyy short, but I wanted it to feel like an intro to a romantic comedy... so yeah. think of it an intro
> 
> AND THE TITLE OF THE FIC IS FROM THE FALL OUT BOY SONG ' A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More "Touch Me"' '

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> intro chapter, next one is in sirius's pov!!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is 100% based on a convo i had with my friends. I'm Remus, they're James and Sirius.

Four teenage boys exited the Starbucks off the fifth avenue, walking down the row in pairs of two. The first pair of boys included a tall boy with long silky black hair and sharp, pointed features, and a slightly shorter boy with unruly raven curls and circle glasses. The second pair consisted of the shortest boy, who was rather plump and had mousy blonde hair, and the tallest boy with golden curls that led down to the nape of his neck. They walked in unison, each holding their own drink. All boys had a Starbucks frappuccino in clutch except for the tallest boy, who had a warm beverage in hand to combat the cold weather. They walked down the path, caught up in childish bickering.

“I’m cold. Can we go to your place, Peter?” the boy with circle glasses asked.

The shortest boy shook his head. “Sorry, can’t. My aunt’s in town and my parents don’t want anyone over. Sorry”, he said apologetically. 

“Bummer”, circle glasses said. “We certainly can’t go over to Sirius’s place. That’s a given… what about you Remus? Is your place available to host our misadventures and to warm our bosoms”.

“No”, the tallest boy said. “Nobody’s coming over, not after what Sirius did last time. And maybe you wouldn’t be so cold if you didn’t all order frappuccinos.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t want to order a hot drink. It might have like… coffee in it”, circle glasses said. 

“That’s the kind of the point of going to Starbucks. To get coffee”, the tallest boy, Remus, seethed. 

Circle glasses shrugged. “You’re so fucking old, Remus. Christ, you sound like my Great Aunt Dorea. ‘Black coffee is the only acceptable coffee. Kids these days drink sugared milk and call it coffee’”, he said in an imitation of an old lady.

“Well, your Great Aunt is right. What you’re drinking is a sorry excuse for coffee”, Remus said before taking a large gulp of his drink.

“Disgusting. Such an old man. I bet he goes to bed at eight, too”, circle glasses said.

“Nah, I know he stays up till three am watching Glee”, the long-haired boy aired. “Also have you seen his activity status. He’s always active on Instagram, even at like four am. It’s kind of scary”.

“And how do you know about my activity status unless you were also up, Sirius?” Remus countered with a raised eyebrow. The long-haired boy, Sirius, shrugged. “Exactly. So don’t lecture me about my bedtime, Sirius Black”.

“Fuck off, Remus. Nobody was lecturing you”, Sirius huffed, although there wasn’t any malice in his voice. 

“Alright, stop your bickering, you sound like a married couple”, circle glasses cut in. “So nobody’s house is free… hmm… I’m starting to think these frappuccinos were a bad idea”.

Remus rolled his eyes. “I hate to say this, but I told you so”.

“James, why are you holding your cup like that?” Peter asked while pointing to circle glasses’ hand. Low and behold, his index finger was pointing out stiffly while the rest of his fingers were wrapped around his frappuccino. 

“Er… Sirius bit my finger”, James answered sheepishly.

“What?”

James blushed a furious shade of red before sighing and shaking his head. “I said Sirius bit my finger”, he repeated more firmly this time.

Remus turned to look at Sirius, who was smiling manically. “Sirius, what the fuck! Why did you bite James’s finger?”

Sirius shrugged. “I don’t know, why don’t you explain, Jimmy?”

“Don’t call me Jimmy!” James snapped. He angrily took another sip from his frappuccino. “Look, I know this is going to sound stupid-”

“If he’s saying it’s stupid, it’s going to be really stupid”.

“Shut up and let me finish, Remus! Anyway, back to what I was saying before I was rudely interrupted… I saw this thing online-”

“Oh, this going to be really fucking stupid”.

“Shut the hell up, Remus! What happened was I saw this thing online that said to stick your hand out in front of your best friend to see how they’d react. Most people would put their head on their hand and it was supposed to be really cute, but Sirius ruined it by bitting my hand instead of putting his head on it!” 

James shot Sirius a dirty look and Sirius beamed in response.

“Sirius, why would you bite James?” Peter asked confused.

“Well, if somebody put a hand in your face, wouldn’t you bite it?” Sirius asked with a nonchalant shrug.

“No! It’s not normal for your first response to having a hand in your face to be to bite it!” Remus exclaimed. 

“You wanna see the video?” James asked while sliding his phone out of his pocket with his abled hand.

“You recorded it?” Remus balked, his eyes going wide and his jaw dropping.

James nodded seriously. “Oh yeah, it was for my story”.

“I need new friends”.


	2. Sirius Black

**10:02 Slughorn’s Class**

“You’re not sorry”.

Sirius sighed dramatically and threw his pencil onto his desk, letting it roll slowly onto his lap. Slughorn was rattling on about Electron Configurations at the front of the class and Sirius was bored out of his mind. So even though he normally wouldn’t fall for James’s bait, today he decided he wouldn’t mind feeding into some useless bickering.

“I’m really sorry, James”, he apologized, his voice a low whisper. “I’ve said it like… a million times before and I’ll say it again. I’m sorry”.

James shrugged in response, his eyes steady at the front board as if he was still trying to pay attention. Sirius honest to god did not know what was going on. He’d spent too much time mucking about on his phone earlier in class to keep up with the diagrams on the board now. He made a mental note to ask Remus for the notes later. Remus always had notes.

“You’re not sorry though”, James whined. “My finger still hurts.”

Sirius rolled his eyes. “It’s been like… two weeks, James. That happened in February and it’s March now. You’re just whining because you like the attention”, Sirius said. He picked his pencil up and placed it next to his unopened notebook.

James cracked a grin. “You caught me there. You know I’m an attention whore if there ever was one”.

Sirius chuckled. “Yeah, it’s okay though James. You don’t have to go sticking your hand in people’s faces for attention, you can always just ask. That way you won’t get bitten.”

“Oi! That actually hurt when you bite me”, James hissed before picking his notebook up and slapping Sirius’s shoulder with it. It made a loud _smack_ noise and everyone’s eyes turned to face the boys. James was never known for his finesse.

Peter and Remus turned around from their desks directly in front of Sirius and James. Peter bore a frown that was most likely due to his lack of inclusion and Remus bore a frown that was most likely due to his utter disappointment in James and Sirius. Sirius was used to it by this point.

“Care to explain what the cause for this… violent outburst?” Slughorn asked, tired. He looked at the two boys with a blank expression. 

James shook his head. “Oh, no. You see, I was just grabbing my notebook to write down some notes on…”, he trailed off, squinting his eyes trying to read the board. “Two-P-2-S-- blimey, is that a computer code? I mean…. I was taking notes on it and my hand just slimmed. That’s all. No violence”.

Sirius could have decked James in the face. No finesse at all.

Slughorn gave the boys a look of disbelief before sighing and continuing his lesson as if nothing happened. Sometimes, denial was the best way to put up with Sirius and James’s actions. It made things much easier.

When class ended, Sirius tapped Remus on the shoulder as he was putting his books away. Remus turned and raised an eyebrow like he always did when he knew Sirius was going to nag him for something. Sometimes, Sirius thought Remus was so predictable, he could write a manual on him.

“Can I borrow your notes?” Sirius asked. He picked the books off his desk and balanced them in his arms.

Remus’s eyes darted to the floor and his cheeks turned a pinkish tint. “Sorry… I wasn’t paying much attention today. Maybe ask Peter though”, he said. 

That was odd. Remus Lupin _always_ had notes for every single class. That was his thing. He was supposed to be the studious one who helped out his generally staying-afloat mates occasionally. 

Sirius nodded his head and shrugged it off. It really was none of his business.

“Alright, yeah. I’ll text Peter later”, he said.

~

**Facts about Sirius Black:**

Sirius Black was born on the third of November, making him a Scorpio. It also made him older than the rest of his friends, who were all born in the winter or spring. Peter had the next birthday in February, making him sixteen as well. Next was Remus, who was born on the tenth which was only a few days away, and last was James who was born towards the end of the year. This meant Sirius got bragging rights of being the oldest, even if he acted the least mature. 

Sirius was mixed race. His father was English and stemmed from a long line of reputable businessmen. Sirius wasn’t too sure what his father businessed, but he thought it had something to do with educational textbooks. His mother was Thai and came from a long line of Thai Entrepreneurs. Her family made their fortune by selling Karaoke machines all over South East Asia. On a business trip to Bangkok, Orion Black had taken an interest in the young daughter of one of the Thai associates. A year of courting later, the two married and the Thai woman changed her name to a favoured English name; Walburga.

Sirius had a younger brother named Regulus. He was fifteen and had been fifteen for one month and two days, as he so liked to remind Sirius. Regulus had it in his dense skull that fifteen was the age true teenagehood started and liked to flaunt his age around like it was something to be proud of. It really wasn’t. 

Sirius befriend James Potter when he was seven years old. The Potter had attended some business gala at the Longbottoms and the Longbottoms were just impartial enough for the Blacks to associate with. Walburga had informed Sirius in a mixture of Thai and English that the Potters weren’t the kind of people Sirius should associate with. She said that while they may be rich, the Potters were a pack of hippies and associated with anyone, no matter class or social status. Walburga also said they associated with homosexuals and other dirt. Seven-year-old Sirius didn’t know what that meant, so he disregarded it. He struck up a conversation with the James Potter boy and rejoiced when he found out they went to the same independent primary school. They were inseparable after that.

Sirius was twelve when he had his first kiss. Sirius was always a good looker, with his long wild black hair and sharp eyes (even if Walburga insisted that when he was eighteen he get them ‘fixed’ in Thailand). Girls had been fawning over him since the onset of puberty, so it was no surprise Sirius when Marlene McKinnon offered to kiss him in the first year of Secondary. 

Sirius hated it. 

He became friends with Remus Lupin, one of the scholar-ship kids, in the middle of Year Seven. He was being picked on by Yaxley and Muclubeir and Sirius, being the gallant twelve-year-old he was, stepped in before things could escalate further. He later came to find that Remus had a killer sense of humour (once you realized his dead-pan wasn’t him being emotionless, rather him being comical) and was wicked smart. Remus Lupin came along with Peter Pettigrew, a shy, if not meek boy with a kind heart.

He got the nickname ‘Padfoot’ two years ago when everyone (teachers, classmates, even his own parents) constantly compared his mannerisms to a dog. While walking to James’s house with Peter, they saw a large black dog with big padded feet and Peter had said something about the dog’s padded feet resembling Sirius’s own large hands and matched his dog-like personality.

And now he was sixteen, full of energy and the carelessness that came along with youth. Sure, he had his moments of self-doubt, like when Walburga was hollering at him or when Orion would give him a busted lip for backtalk, but it was easy to forget about all that when he was around his three friends stampeding around the school. He was big and tall.

~

**18:29 James Potter’s Room**

“I think Lily Evans might like me”, James aired. He threw himself against his bed, the bed creaking as flopped down. “She gave me this look today, it was fiery”.

Sirius spared James a glance, tearing his eyes away from the English homework he was doing on James’s floor. James was staring at the ceiling, his eyes lovestruck behind his circle glasses. He had that dopey smile he always got when talking about Lily Evans.

“I think I should tell your mother to get you checked out”, Sirius while writing the last sentence of his paper. 

“Why? For my hand that you bit?”

Sirius reddened. James was holding onto that one incident like he was a leprechaun and his bitten hand was gold. It was _one_ time.

“No, the fact that you’re delusional enough to believe Lily Evans fancies you! She doesn’t!” James curled up on his bed and made a whimpering noise, causing Sirius to let out a hoarse chuckle. 

“You’re right, Padfoot. I hate to say it, but you’re right. Lily Evans wouldn’t spare a second glance at me. I’m pretty sure she hates all of us… well… except Moony”, James huffed. 

“I’m pretty sure she doesn’t completely hate Peter”, Sirius offered. 

James glared at him. “Not helping”.

“Sorry”.

James sighed and stared at his wall. “Are you staying for dinner? Mum’s making curry and rice, your favourite. She can give you a ride home, too”.

Sirius thought about it for a second before nodding his head. “Yeah, that’d be great”. It was either eat at the Potters, have a nice discussion with adult figures who genuinely cared for him, and spend more time with James or go home, sit through a stiff passive-aggressive meal, and risk getting yelled at. There wasn’t much competition.

James turned over to face Sirius and gave him a lopsided grin. “Good, cause I’m going to talk your ear off about what Snivelly said to me today.”

~

**22: 41 Sirius Black’s Room**

Sirius Black’s bedroom was much larger than the rest of his friends’, even James’s. He had a large bed shoved in one corner of his room with a nightstand next to it. At the foot of his bed laid a victorian-esq dresser that had months of unwashed clothes laying on it. On the other side of his room, he had a large desk and a bookshelf. The walls of the room were pained grey and the wooden floor was dark oak. 

Sirius dimmed his lights and slide into the chair of his desk. He logged onto his computer, which was perched on top of his desk, and went into his secrete Discord account.

He clicked into a chat called, “Queer and Here” and looked to see who was active. Much to his delight, _wolffy29_ was active on the chat.

**_Queer and Here  
22:24 _ **

**starrrgaz1g: what’s up??????**

_wolffy29: hiiiiiiiiiiii_

_wolffy29: we missed u up here. what have u been up to?_

**starrgaz1ng: not much. just doing homework**

_wolffy29: same… i think i might pull an allnighter student today get too much homework_

**starrgaz1ng: yeah :/**

**starrgaz1ng: how is it going with ur man?**

_wolffy29: he’s not my man…_

_wollfy29: and i told u im not pursuing it. i’ve already got a girlfriend_

_wollfy29: im just admiring him_

**starrgazz1ng: dammmmmmnnnnnnnn**

**starrgazz1ng: u should break up with ur girlfriend a go get ur man**

_wollfy29: no cause i really like my girlfriend. she’s great and i shouldn’t even be admiring anybody else when i’m with her._

**starrgazz1ng: okaayyyy finneeeeeee**

swordslyer328: can u guys pm or something? ur blowing up my phone 

**starrgazz1ng: sorry**

**stargazz1ng: wanna pm, wollfy?**

_wollfy29: sure !!!! ___

____

__****_Private Message to wolffy29_ **** _ _

___**  
** _ **  
****  
**

__**starrgazz1ng: so no chance of u getting with your man, huh?** _ _

___wollfy29: no._ _ _

___wollfy29: my girlfriend and i are in a healthy relationship with eachother and i like her. i shouldn’t even be looking at other ppl like that. im also pretty sure he’s straight_ _ _

__**starrgazz1ng: alright, alright. i’ll drop it** _ _

___wollfy29: thanks_ _ _

___wolffy29: anyway, what about YOUR mystery boy????? any luck with him???_ _ _

__**starrgazz1ng: ugggghhhhhhhh** _ _

__**starrgazz1mg: no cuz im pretty sure he’s straight, he has a girlfriend, and he like one of my best mates. im not even out to my friends cause im scared they might be dicks about it… so yeah… that a no** _ _

___wollfy29: oof, im sorry m8_ _ _

___wollfy29: im sure you’ll find someone_ _ _

__**starrgazz1ng: i hope so** _ _

__**stargazz1ng: until then, we will torture ourselves by surrounding ourselves with boys we can never have :(** _ _

___wollfy29: :(_ _ _


	3. Remus Lupin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> remus's life being the essay-writting, bisexual scholarship kid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, so um... this was fun to write. i'd like to start off by saying: i do not encourage the use of stimulants to increase productivity. however, i decided to add that bit into this chapter because (unfortunately) many kids feel like they need to resort to it inorder to keep up with demanding course work.
> 
> **TW: minor drug use**

**12:09 Dining Hall**

Sirius Black was gorgeous. His black silky hair is longer than most boys their age and it flows in soft waves down the nap of his back, half of it tied in a man-bun and the other half swishing as Sirius propped his elbows against the wall of the counter of the lunch line as he shamelessly flirted with the dinner lady. He batted his long pretty lashes that turn downwards and flashed the lady working the kitchen a toothy smile, making her blush a furious shade of red. Remus doesn’t know if he ought to be impressed, horrified, or jealous.

Impressed because Sirus Black could flirt shamelessly with _anyone_ and not get a drink thrown at him or slapped across the face. Everyone at Godric’s Secondary knew that Sirius Black was a flirt, and that he doesn’t mean it, and that he kissed and told, but that didn’t stop anyone from falling for his tricks. Even the dinner ladies apparently.

Horrified because Sirius was flirting with a diner lady. And sure she was young, maybe twenty-two at most, but _still_. It was weird.

Jealous because Remus would kill to have Sirius Black flirt like that with him, even if Sirius didn’t mean it, because Remus felt sparks whenever he looked too long at Sirius. But Remus _shouldn’t_ feel those sparks because he is already in a relationship with somebody and felt sparks around her. Tonks is amazing and Remus was totally head over heels for her - or at least he thinks he is- but how could one feel sparks for two people at the same time? 

“You’re such a dog, Sirius”, Remus said when Sirius stopped flirting, getting an extra apple tart in reward, and the two boys moved down the lunch line. They exited the kitchens and headed into the dining hall, heading towards their table.

Sirius grinned at Remus and Remus felt his heart stop beating just for a second. “Look Remus, there are just some things a man has gotta do for an apple tart”, he said while winking one of his large yet sharp eyes. 

They weave through a hoard of younger students, who move out of the way as they approach them like they were water and oil. People knew not to mess around with Sirius Black.

“You’re shameless”.

“Yes, but shameless is just a synonym for ‘has more fun’. You should try it sometimes”, he responded as he placed his tray on the table and took a seat next to James while Remus took his own next to Peter and across from the two other boys.

“What did Sirius do now?” James mused.

“He flirted with the dinner lady to get an extra apple-tart like the dog he is”, Remus responded with a grimace to cover up the fact that he’s the dog for wishing that he was on the receiving end of Sirius’s flirting. He really shouldn't be jealous.

James smiled and clapped Sirius on the shoulder proudly. “Atta-boy”.

“Don’t encourage it”, Remus scowled. He picked up the half-rotted apple and took a bite out of it. The taste of chemical fertilizers and decaying apple skin help take his mind off the sparks he felt earlier.

“C’mon Moony, you have to respect my game”, Sirius said through a mouthful of apple tart. James just shrugged in response. “I’m just practicing for when I have to go out into the real world”.

“Oh my god. Peter, please tell me that you agree with me and think that Sirius should not be flirting with diner ladies to get extra apple-tarts”, Remus begged, turning to look at Peter, who was furiously scribbling something down in a notebook.

“Huh?” Peter said, snapping his head up. “Sorry, I was just making a list of people I need to email for the Yearbook. What’s going on?”

Remus sighed. “Nothing”. He took another bite of his chemical-infused apple. He glanced at the large analog hanging above the stage. Three more hours until school would let out. Three hours too long.

~

**Facts about Remus Lupin:**

Remus Lupin was born on the tenth of March, making him a Pisces and scheduling his sixteenth birthday in approximately three days. This scared Remus as he knew how his friends were and he knew what they liked to do for their birthdays.

Remus Lupin was in the backseat of his parent’s Ford when they were T-boned. He spent the month in the hospital recovering and still had scars from the shattered glass that cut him eleven years later. His father survived the crash with a broken leg. His mother was not so lucky. She had permanent damage on her back that left her unable to walk without assistance somedays. While she had put on a brave face and did her best to hide her pain, she died of medical complications when Remus was fourteen. He had recurring nightmares about the Ford crashing and waking up on the hard road and seeing his mother’s mutilated body next to him.

Remus lived with his father in a two-bedroom flat twenty minutes away from the affluent neighborhood James and Sirius lived in. Ever since Hope Lupin’s death, Lyall Lupin grew withdrawn from the world around him. He generally let Remus do whatever as long as his marks were decent. His only rules were no girls in the house and no drugs, which Remus took lightly. Remus only ever wished his father was more fatherly about once a month.

Every year at Godric’s Secondary, the entire lower secondary participates in a game called ‘Spot the Scholarship’ in which kids would try to figure out which Year Sevens were on scholarship. Remus was the first to be found out on his second week at school and was locked in a broom closet for three hours before anyone found him. People stopped picking on him after Sirius Black and James Potter took him in. Lily Evans was the next to be found out, but people didn’t give her a hard time because she was so likable. Severus Snape was the next one, and he got knocked around a bit before Yaxley and Mucluber took him in as a runt.

Remus was failing Chemistry terribly, which was horrible because if he failed the class, he’d get kicked off his scholarship. He really wanted to pass Chemistry, but he found the subject terribly confusing. His brain just didn’t click with the subject. 

Remus wrote other student’s essays; ten pounds for every thousand words. That along with his part-time job at the local Tesco was enough to supply him with decent pocket money. He saved the rest of it in case of an emergency.

He got the nickname ‘Moony’ when he was fourteen after chugging a jar of Moonshine. He never wished to do it again.

He was dating Nymphadora Tonks, who went by her last name and just so happened to be Sirius Black’s younger cousin. Tonks attended the local state school and lived a five-minute walk away. She was fifteen, loud-mouthed, proudly pansexual, and wore clunky Doc Martens. She was the only one who knew that Remus was bisexual. He didn’t tell anyone else in fear they’d be weird about it (as they had been weird when Tonks first came out). Remus Lupin liked Tonks very much, enjoyed holding her hand and kissing her on the cheek before class, but he also let himself develop a small… slightly larger than small… crush on Sirius Black. It was terrible.

~

**19:22 The Lupin’s Kitchen/Dinning Room**

“You should let me do your industrial”.

Remus popped open the microwave to retrieve the two bowls of Instant noddles he stuck in there while sparing a glance at Tonks, who was sitting at the dining table. He wasn’t technically allowed to have Tonks over at the flat, but his father was at work so really, no one would know. Lyall Lupin worked late some nights and some nights he stayed out late getting drinks with coworkers. Sometimes Remus wondered if it was so he wouldn’t have to spend time with him. 

“I’m not letting you do my industrial”, Remus responded. He took the two bowls of instant noodles and slid one over to Tonks. 

Tonks frowned. “But I did your cartilage and it’s fine”.

Remus smiled sheepishly as he took a seat next to Tonks. He handed her a fork for the noodles and began to dig into his own bowl. “I know, I’m not worried about you fucking up the piercing or anything. I’m more so concerned with the fact that I got detention for a month after you did my cartilage… something about it ‘violating’ dress code regulations…”

Tonks laughed and took a bite of her noddles. “Okay, but once you go to college you’ve got to let me put a bar in. Alright?”

Remus spun his noodles around his fork, mulling over the prospect of having his industrial done. Remus had always admired piercings. He’d had so many needles poked and prodded in him when he was younger, so the idea of having a needle go through him didn’t phase him. Tonks had her entire ear pierced up, a tongue piercing, and a nose ring. She did half of them herself (which Remus thought was crazy cool), and she had offered to do some on Remus. He let her do a double lobe set and a helix, which landed him a month of detention. He did not want to repeat that. But in a few months he’d be done with Secondary and off to a Sixth Form College that didn’t have any dress code, so getting a bar in his ear was plausible.

“Yeah, alright. I’ll let you do my industrial once I leave Godric”.

Tonks smiled, her entire face lighting up. Remus couldn’t help but think it was cute. Even through her piercings, clunky boots, and dark clothing, Remus always thought Tonks was adorable.

“Great! I promise I won’t fuck it up”.

“That’s reassuring”.

“Fuck off”.

~

**21:39 Remus Lupin’s Bedroom**

Chemistry, three Essays (only one of which was actually his), and a maths worksheet. It was a lot. It didn’t help that Remus had spent the majority of the evening with Tonks and was currently messaging some random boy he met on a discord server. They started private messaging a few days ago and since then Remus had spent most evening messaging him, hence why he was so behind with his work. He’d have to pull an all-nighter to get everything done… but not before finishing his conversation with starrgazz1ng.

_wollfy29: so hows it going with ur mystery man?_

_wolffy29: do i even get a name?_

**starrgazz1ng: noooo**

**starrgazz1ng: my friends don’t respect my privacy and might snoop through my messages.**

**starrgazz1ng: definitely don’t need them finding out i’m gay, never mind that I have a crush on one of our frineds**

_wolffy29: oof, okay. so im guessing that also means there was no progress with him?_

**starrgazz1ng: no**

**starrgazz1ng: and im pretty sure he’s having very heterosexual sex with his girlfriend right now :(**

_wollfy29: awww, im sorry to hear that_

**starrgazz1ng: it’s okay. i’ll find someone eventually…. Hopefully**

**starrgazz1ng: thank u for sending your condolences. ur the best**

_wollfy29: no problem m8_

_wolffy29: anyways, i gtg. got a shit ton of work to do. nice talking with u_

**starrgazz1ng: nice talking with u 2**

Remus sighed as he exited discord. He met starrgazz1ng on a discord server he joined when he was still questioning. Tonks had suggested he find a support group beyond her, and seeing how immature James, Sirius, and Peter behaved when Tonks came out, Remus decided to venture onto the internet.

Remus always knew he had an interest in boys. He’d notice the way their hair draped down, shaping their jaws, and the way their deep voices would make his head spin. But he also knew he liked girls. He liked the way they laughed and fit perfectly under his arms in an embrace. Because of his interest in girls, Remus had always tried to push thoughts of boys out of his head, hoping his attraction to the same sex was only fleeting. It was hard enough being one of four scholarship kids in his year, he didn’t need the added stress of being gay as well. And he liked girls, so he couldn’t possibly be gay. Right?

Then he met Tonks. Sirius brought her to one of James’s get-togethers at the request of Andromeda Tonks, who feared her daughter wasn’t getting out enough. Tonks and Remus hit it off immediately, her raunchy humour combating with his witty dark humour. After finding out they lived in such close proximity, they exchanged numbers and the rest was history.

Tonks helped Remus through a lot of his questioning as Remus helped Tonks through a lot of her own struggles. She had come out as pan to him two weeks after meeting him (he was the first person she came out to) and soon later came out to her family and friends. Her school friends, while limited, proved to be supportive. Her friends made up in quality what they lacked in quantity. Others, however, were not so kind. Remus would be lying if he hadn’t heard James, Peter, and Sirius make a few quips at Tonks’s expense, furthering Remus’s own struggles coming to terms with his sexuality. He knew that if he ever came out to them, they’d either begin to feel really bad for all of their juvenile sexuality jokes and consequently become weird around him or Remus would be the new butt of the joke. Both options were less than desirable. 

Remus grabbed a pencil from his cup filled with stationary and took out a sheet of paper. He’d make twenty pounds tomorrow, half of which he’d put into saving. He remembered the way his family struggled to pay for their medical care after the crash and how his father struggled to pay for his mother’s medical bills throughout her life. Remus needed to have some safety, some safety net, to fall back onto if something like that ever happened again. Sometimes he felt like a squirrel, hiding his acorns for winter. His friends called him a ‘work-a-holic’ for working too many hours at Tesco (10 per week), and they didn’t even know about his essay side business.

He started on the first of his three essays, opting to do his own first. When he was finished with that one, he logged back into his computer to type the other two out. He didn’t want any teachers recognising his handwriting. His father came home while he was working on the second, knocking on Remus’s door to see if he was still awake before wishing him a stiff ‘g’night’.

It was nearly four am when he finished the third essay and he still had a worksheet and Chemistry to study for. With the prospect of sleep seeming less plausible, Remus reached over to one of his desk drawers and slid it out. Under a mass of pencils and piles of papers laid a ziplock bag filled with small blue tablets. He didn’t take Adderall often, but some nights (such as this one when he was extremely behind on schoolwork) it was needed. He took one out of the bag and threw it back, dry swallowing it. It would last until the morning hours when he could step outside his room to brew a pot of coffee.


End file.
